Hello, Lockout. So We Meet Again, Eh?

Yep, it's the same art I used for my NFL lockout post on March 11. I'm not creative in that way

Lockout, part deux. And like most sequels, this one isn’t as “good” as the year’s original.

When the NFL established its lockout in March, the owners and the players were worlds apart when discussing how to split up the league’s revenue, but there was some optimism that they would act in time to save the entire season. That optimism seems to have grown in the past few weeks.

The two sides in the NBA’s negotiations seem even further separated right now. While some say the league won’t lose games because both players and owners will start to cave under when the prospects of lost checks start looming in September and October, there is a popular belief that some hardline owners — those in smaller markets and losing the most money — are willing to lose some or all of a season to reshape the league’s financial landscape.

That is scary. And I’m not talking about that 66-word sentence.

For now, there’s no reason to pay attention to anything said by either side. No one will make concessions in July or August, when the regular season still looks like something that resides in a land far, far away. When the NBA’s calendar turns to September, much where we are now with the NFL in late June, important people will begin to think about their immediate bottom line shrinking if something isn’t hammered out soon. It’s at that time when we will see the true colors of the players and the owners.

Checking Back On Those MLB Preseason Predictions

Here’s a self-serving exercise!

It’s June 30, the midway point of the MLB season. After today, 24 of the 30 teams will have played at least 81 games. So let’s see how some of the prognostications I made back in March have turned out.

Everything in bold is what I said would happen prior to the first pitch.

Spoiler alert: It’s turning out to be a lot of all or nothing. Either I was dead right on things or I just have no business watching baseball any longer.

———–

The Fantasy Implications Of Terrell Owens’ Torn ACL

Don't cry -- T.O. will be playing football soon enough. Just not as soon as his agent says

Sometimes, athletes get hurt during downtime. I get that.

But it was absolutely stunning to me when news of Terrell Owens’ ACL surgery found the light of day on Sunday night. We’ve all been through similar stories with Kellen Winslow and Aaron Boone and Ben Roethlisberger. But it doesn’t make such a major injury during the sport’s offseason any less surprising.

Owens will become a free agent when the lockout concludes and is almost certainly not going to line up for another play as a Bengal. However, he experienced a career resurrection of sorts with them last year.

He was flat-out awful in Buffalo, but Owens was actually one of fantasy football’s top wide receivers from weeks 4-9 last season. He ended the year with 72 catches, 983 yards and nine touchdowns, which were extremely pleasant outputs — that is, if you had him on your team; if you didn’t, you were probably waiting for your “fluke” prediction to come true and got exceedingly more upset with every big game T.O. turned in.

Don’t forget that he played in essentially just 13 games with the Bengals before a torn meniscus in the same knee that is the focus now shut him down early in week 15 and forced him to go on injured reserve.

Before there were any worries about Owens’ ACL, he was probably considered a deep WR2 or a high-end WR3 in standard leagues. Everyone had pretty much assumed that he would have to settle for another one-year contract, and his value in the fantasy world would largely hinge upon his landing spot. Now those teams that may have been interested in signing him have some serious concerns to mull over. Chief among them: Do we really want to add a 37-year-old T.O. for this season, knowing he probably won’t be useful for more than a month and has a very good chance of missing it entirely?

What’s that?

Drew Rosenhaus says that T.O. can be ready to play by the start of September?! Well, how convenient.

The Most Important Petition You Will Ever Sign

I bow to you, sir

Well, outside of anything that has to do with human rights advances or the prevention of political villainy.

OK, so consider this the most important petition about sports that you will sign …

… this year.

There is an online petition going around in support of the great Vin Scully getting one last opportunity to announce a World Series. I advise you to sign it and then send it to everyone you know and make sure that they send it to everyone they know and so on.

I doubt it will make a dent anywhere. I first heard about this on Wednesday and as of right now, there are only about 6,700 electronic signatures counted. But that doesn’t mean the effort for a very awesome idea can’t be put forth.

You already know that Scully would be more entertaining in October than Joe Buck, and he makes Tim McCarver look like a nun when it comes to baseball knowledge.

Scully, 80, hasn’t called a World Series since 1988. But even as he nears a still-unknown date with retirement, he remains one of the sharpest announcers of any sport. While he doesn’t travel past Colorado these days, he is only man in the Dodgers’ TV booth when he’s on the call. It’s been that way ever since Don Drysdale’s death in 1993. And sometimes, Scully is the sole carrier of the game’s simulcast on radio, too. Again, he’s 80!

He is a true master at storytelling, and when most broadcasters depend upon the game itself to give them something to talk about during the late innings, Scully never runs out of beautiful yarns related to what you are watching.

Why can’t we have something like that one last time during the Fall Classic? It would be a proper and merited gesture.

The Dodgers ARE RICH! (Offensively Speaking)

A spot of sunshine in the midst of a never-ending shit storm

On the same day in which their owner filed for bankruptcy and secured a $150 million loan to ensure that he would meet Thursday’s payroll deadline — please, sir … just go away. I beg you — the Los Angeles Dodgers showed that they are replete on the field. That is, at least for one night.

The Dodgers entered Monday with 297 runs this season, the fifth-lowest total in the National League. But trends be dammed! The Dodgers busted out for 15 against the Twins on the road in a shutout effort.

It was the second time in franchise history that the Dodgers scored at least 15 runs on the road while shutting out the other side. Tuesday is the 42-year anniversary of the only other time it happened. The Dodgers beat the Padres, 19-0 with Don Drysdale on the hill that day. Talk about overkill.

Guns, Crips, Robbery, A Sex Tape and Shaq. Now THAT Sounds Like A Story!

Say what you will about TMZ — Harvey Levin’s gossip bunch harasses public figures, even those with minimal relevance, night after night largely for the purpose of antagonizing them to the rest of the world — they don’t get it wrong often when it comes to reporting stories. Here’s a pretty sensationalistic one that contains Shaquille O’Neal.

The basic facts are there is an ongoing criminal case centering around seven men who allegedly kidnapped, beat up and robbed a man who claimed to be in possession of a sex tape.

That sex tape is allegedly of Shaq, and it shows him, well, you understand why they call it a sex tape.

The seven men have been arrested and charged with robbery, kidnapping and other crimes. They are currently in the middle of a preliminary hearing and being held in jail.

Part of the backstory is that Shaq if friends with one of the accused — Ladell Rowles, who is a member of the Main Street Mafia Crip Gang in Los Angeles. He also knows the guy who got the crap beat out of him, Robert Ross. According to TMZ, Shaq and his business manager, Mark Stevens, have a record label and allegedly told Ross they would give him a 50 percent cut in any artists he brought to them. Ross claims he delivered Ray J to Shaq, but got cut out of the deal.

The Reality For The Miami Heat

The Miami Heat will have to climb the long championship ladder yet again next year

Today, as expected, has been mostly about how the Miami Heat didn’t win an NBA Championship last night. LeBron and the Heat failed or choked or something like that.

In the spare moments of time left after all of that, someone points out that the Dallas Mavericks actually won and deservedly so. They were the better team; they hit more shots; they played better defense and played their best when the going got tough. Unfortunately, the U.S. majority will forget that more than they forget who Dallas beat.

The saying goes that no one ever remembers second place. That won’t be true this year, which is too bad.

With that being said, let’s talk some more about the Miami Heat!

OK, I’m not going to pile on. I don’t really care what was said last night. Let’s let it go, folks.

No, I want to be LeBron positive for a moment before I change my tune here.

The guy is going to win an NBA Championship at some point, probably more than one. He’s too good and his team is too good to keep coming up short as the years go by. What happened this week is probably just another case of how NBA stars reach the top of the mountain — there always seems to be valleys before the peaks. For the many who don’t want to see him succeed, there will come a time when they (we?) will have to deal with it and give him his due. It will happen.

But for those who want to keep fantasizing about how difficult it will be for the Heat to win an NBA title, well, you’re not wrong. Like every other team, they now have to start from square one again and set out on long road.

Dan Gilbert Just Can’t Shut Up

One of the reasons I don’t post here as much as I should or even as much as I would like is this really stupid way of thinking I have toward short posts.

I realize it’s stupid, but I can’t get away from it. I decide against writing a post if I don’t think I can get at least 400-plus words out of it. That’s basically why I do Running Off at the Electronic Mouth; most of those are just a jumble of subjects I want to write about here but don’t because of this bastardization I’ve placed upon small posts.

But I’m going to overcome this right now — although that was a pretty long intro about being short, so I may have defeated the purpose. Aw, damn.

Anyway, Cleveland Cavaliers owner Dan Gilbert needs to be quiet. Here’s what he said via Twitter shortly after LeBron James and the Miami Heat were ultimately vanquished in Game 6 of the NBA Finals tonight:

“Congrats to Mark C.&entire Mavs org. Mavs NEVER stopped & now entire franchise gets rings. Old Lesson for all:There are NO SHORTCUTS. NONE“

Dan, nobody likes a sore loser. Especially a rich one.

And nobody likes a chatty sore loser who is in no position to talk.

What happened to Miami doesn’t make what Gilbert said in his “open letter” right. This doesn’t vindicate his actions. This is not an “I told you so!” moment. Actually, what happened to Miami has nothing to do with him, but Gilbert apparently feels compelled to make himself part of the story with a season-ending jab at his former employee.

Meanwhile, his own NBA team finished with the league’s second-lowest win total, set a record for longest losing streak, won 19 games and have the honor of holding the No. 1 pick in a watered-down draft. Gilbert should focus more on those issues than trying to make it look like he’s sitting atop some sort of moral high ground.

It’s slightly ironic that this was addressed to Cuban; over the past year, Gilbert has zoomed past Cuban as the NBA owner most in need of a muzzle.

Was that short enough for ya? I’m trying.

Running Blog For Game 6 Of The 2011 NBA Finals

A couple of weeks ago, this seemed destined for Miami. But does it fly back with the Mavericks to Dallas tonight?

Hello, party people. Let’s all get together for another one for More Talk’s fireside chats.

Tonight, the stage is set for Game 6 of these NBA Finals, where one of three overall storylines will emerge and lead all sports chatter:

The Dallas Mavericks are champions, which will lead to more LeBron bashing

The Miami Heat force Game 7 because of someone other than LeBron James, which will lead to more LeBron bashing.

The Miami Heat force Game 7 thanks to LeBron James, which I’m sure people will forget and just start asking: “why didn’t he do this sooner?” It’ll be a lose-lose-lose situation for him.

Personally, I think the Heat are going to win this game. I mean, don’t you want to see a Game 7 in this type of series? It’s been thrilling every step of the way, and everyone should want as much of it as the NBA can offer.

5:09 p.m. Anyway, we are off! Chalmers takes the first shot and airballs it. Nice.

5:09 p.m. But I think he deserves to be in the starting lineup tonight, as he is.

Running Blog For Game 5 Of The 2011 NBA Finals

To put it appropriately …

I just wrote a post on LeBron James to satisfy my need to say something about what appears to be the biggest controversy since the United States invaded Iraq.

So I really don’t want to talk about James in the introduction here. I don’t care about how many points he scores. He needs to play better, but everyone has seemingly forgotten another very real storyline for this game: The pressure is on the Mavericks tonight. They HAVE to win this game or this series is over.

But that doesn’t seem to matter. It’s all about LeBron. Ugh, whatever. Here’s a running blog on tonight’s game, a sporting event that I haven’t been eager to watch since Game 7 of last year’s NBA Finals when my Lakers beat the Celtics. I hope you follow along with me.

And if these first four games are any hint, have some water beside you. Hydration has been key in this exhausting series.

6:01 p.m. J.J. Barea stays in the lineup. Man, I hope the Lakers find a way to sign him as a free agent during the offseason.

OK, I’ll stop talking about the Lakers.

6:02 p.m. I tried to download the coveritlive applet for this running blog, but that site has some sort of problem with WordPress. I really like that format, as it would allow me to type without having to refresh, and all of your comments could appear right along side me in real time.

Oh well. Maybe later. Maybe for Game 6 on Sunday.

6:04 p.m. However, if Miami wins tonight, I don’t know if I will want to watch Game 6.

That being said, I will not give a prediction on LeBron’s offense, but I will give a prediction on the game.

Heat 89, Mavericks 83

I know this is all about LeBron in the eyes of many, but I think the Heat as a team respond big after that Tuesday loss.

6:07 p.m. And here we go!! Dallas gets the tip.

When Has There Ever Been This Much Pressure On One Player In One Non-Must-Win Game?

I’ve been trying to think about that title question all day, and I can’t remember a time when the masses called upon one player to provide them with much, even though there will be a tomorrow for everyone involved after tonight.

We are just about an hour away from Game 5 of this year’s NBA Finals, a game which has built up the most anticipation inside of me for any sporting contest since Game 7 of last year’s NBA Finals.

It’s Game 5, but it is certainly Game 7 for the Mavericks. The pressure** should be on them. There is no way Dallas is going to win a Game 7 in Miami, much less both Game 6 and 7 in that same city. If Dallas loses tonight, the final one or two games of this series will just be academic. With a win, the Heat are champions. Maybe not officially tonight, but it will happen before the end of next week.

If Miami loses tonight, they go home trailing in this series, 3-2. In reality, it would be a distressing situation for Miami, but I don’t think anyone is going to write them off as dead, given their talent.

Unfortunately, we no longer live in reality. Tonight, we all exist in a sports world where famine, pestilence and all-out Armageddon converge upon a 6-foot-8-inch basketball player from Akron, Ohio.

ESPN Is Keeping It Surreal, Son. How Surreal? Surreal Real, Son!

Bob Ley is one of the more respected sports journalists on television. He has won eight Sports Emmy Awards. He is an original SportsCenter anchor and while he remains with ESPN, he’s not looking for his next pounded-into-your-skull catchphrase, unlike most of his co-workers.

But who knew Bob Ley could spit so much hot fiya?!

What! What! What! What! What! What! OHHHHHHHHHH!! Bob Ley’s hurtin’ ‘em. Oops, pow, surprise!

Seriously, someone needs to make DJ Steve Porter aware of this gold.

This … whatever this is … stems from DeShawn Stevenson’s most recent shots at LeBron James, saying he “checked out” in Game 4. And of course, this harkens back to a time when Stevenson and James got into another little feud, which ended up with Jay-Z getting involved and writing those lyrics you just heard eloquently repeated by Ley, aimed at Stevenson.

I watched this live on “Outside The Lines” with my mouth agape. My only conclusion is this: Endless and exhausted coverage of LeBron’s failures is clearly putting ESPN’s most esteemed talent closer and closer to the insane asylum.

Oakland A’s Fire Bob Geren, Replace Him With Soon-To-Be Fired Bob Melvin

Maybe it’s karma.

I join with a couple of friends on Facebook before every MLB season to exchange predictions. I presented mine here. As we were going through this exercise, I pointed out that one of them had tabbed Don Wakamatsu and A.J. Hinch to be his managers of the year in 2010.

Instead, they were fired. I had a nice laugh over it.

Now the shoe is on the other foot, or however that saying goes. The A’s cut ties with Bob Geren today, my MOY choice back in March.

A lot of times, a manager is fired because someone has to pay for a team’s lack of success, be it his fault or not. Granted, the A’s are very bad, and a lot of that blame can only go to those on the field. Only one player on that team — Josh Willingham — has an OPS of more than .700. No one on that roster with more than 100 at-bats as of Thursday afternoon has a batting average higher than .265. They have scored the fewest runs in the American League. The pitching staff has been OK, but Brett Anderson may be just days away from receiving very bad news yet again.

A Short Statement On Game 4 Of Heat vs. Mavericks

I have just one thing to say after watching Game 4 of these 2011 NBA Finals:

I am infinitely grateful that the Lakers aren’t a part of this madness.

I don’t have a true favorite in this fight. I would really like to see Miami lose, but I am not a Mavericks fan. In the end, I really don’t care who wins.

But this series has kept me nervous throughout. If the Lakers were facing the Heat, I’m pretty sure I would be pulling a Dirk Nowitzki right now — sick and exhausted beyond words, running a fever, unsure of how much strength I have left in my body. I would be afraid for my life if Kobe and Co. were involved.

These four games have been unlike anything I have experienced in an L.A.-less NBA Championship round. Each game has been back and forth, up and down. Just when you think the Heat have it under control and pull away, the Mavs rise from the dead over and over again.

But they never get too far ahead.

The second half of each contest has had me grabbing my head in amazement. The drama has been intense, like two heavyweight champs standing in front of each other and trading body blows with their guard completely down.

Now we’ve got a ultra-critical swing game coming Thursday night. If the Mavericks win, they will travel back to Miami with a 3-2 series lead. If the Heat win, a championship is all but theirs.

It feels destined to be an all-time classic in a series that has been nothing but classic. So I’ll be here Thursday night doing a running blog of Game 5. I hope you can join me while this most compelling basketball theater present its latest chapter.

In What Direction Is Trevor Bauer’s Left Leg Going And Other Ramblings From Day 1 Of The 2011 MLB First-Year Player Draft

It’s difficult to get emotionally invested in the MLB First-Year Player Draft. You want to project what this means for the future of your team, but you have to realize these guys won’t have an impact for at least a few years, and a good number of them will forgotten forever.

Looking at the first round of the 2006 draft, I know barely half of those names. And those guys were supposed to be the top of that crop.

So I don’t even try to get involved with all of the prognostications and outlooks when it comes to this thing. I just kind of sit back and view it as a passive observer, much like I did last night. Here are some things I noticed and wrote down as the first round, including the compensation round, took shape. I’m not going to list every pick in the first round, just those that had something of interest to me. If you want a full recap, go somewhere that is not here.

1. Pittsburgh Pirates select RHP Gerrit Cole from UCLA

Here are the pitchers who were taken with the No. 1 overall pick since the first amateur draft was held in 1965:

David Clyde, who was mishandled.

Floyd Bannister, who was at least better than Brian Bannister.

Mike Moore, who never made a documentary film.

Tim Belcher, who doesn’t like cameras, so don’t make a documentary film about him.

Andy Benes, who has an 11-minute video on YouTube of his jersey being retired at the University of Evansville.

Ben McDonald, who was Strasburg before Strasburg. That’s pre-injury. Maybe the comparison will be closer than first thought.

Brien Taylor, who was only trying to defend his brother.

Paul Wilson, who at least was better than Bill Pulsipher.

Kris Benson, who has a hot wife.

Matt Anderson, who couldn’t throw a baseball because he threw an octopus.

Bryan Bullington, who has one more MLB win than me. He’s THAT good.

Luke Hochevar, who is one of the best Quadruple-A pitchers I have ever seen.

David Price, who is … pretty good? How the hell did that happen???

Stephen Strasburg, who is recovering.

So, let me be the first to say of Gerrit Cole — meh.

He better get himself a hot wife.

Plaxico Burress’ Fantasy Prospects for 2011

Who knows if Plaxico Burress “gets it.” Watching the re-air of his August 2009 interview with ESPN, you can see that Burress was a bit disgusted at that time. Not with himself but with his situation.

“I gotta wake up every morning and look at my leg, and I got a hole in my leg. And I gotta go to prison for almost killing myself.”

Actually, Burress had to go to prison for unlawfully possessing a gun. And while the penalty was harsh, that’s how it is in New York for such crimes. You don’t try to make yourself the victim for being ignorant about the law.

I don’t know if his point of view has changed in the past 22 months. But that’s the one of the perks of fantasy football — you can act like a general manager while not worrying about character concerns.

Terrell Owens has been a jerk for most of his career, but if he can get you 80 yards and a touchdown every week, he can say whatever he wants. You don’t care about chemistry; just win, baby!

Michael Vick slaughtered dogs, but if he can get 28 fantasy points per week (which is close to what he averaged in 12 games last season), you can find a way to push his failings as a person to the back. I know that sounds amazingly cold, but that’s how you have to approach fantasy sports. Biases must fly out the window.

However, Plaxico isn’t Vick. On the field, I mean. Vick appears to be in his prime and is considered by many to be a first-round pick in fantasy drafts this fall. Burress is a largely unknown commodity.

Running Off At The Electronic Mouth, No. XVIII

It's one step closer to Miami

• There’s not much I can say about Game 3 of the NBA Finals. The Mavericks played pretty well; they just need players other than Dirk to step up on offense and cut back on the turnovers. The Mavericks are plus-11 in turnovers this series. That’s not a good thing.

On the other side, Chris Bosh had three rebounds, LeBron scored just 17 points, the bench did little outside of Chalmers, the defense was very average … and the Heat still won. The biggest takeaway from this game for me is this: The Mavericks will have to win the next three games to win the championship because there is NO CHANCE of them winning a Game 7 in Miami.

• Speaking of no chance, that’s exactly what I thought the Mavericks had at the half to win Game 2. I was so confident, I told a friend of mine that I would give $100 to a charity of his choice if Dallas won the game.

Oh well. There are much worse penalties for losing a bet than being a Samaritan. I submitted my first $10 installment today because I’m not exactly swimming in cash at the moment to just drop the Benjamin in one dose.

By the way, please donate to Partners In Health. I gave to the general fund, but there are many good causes to choose from. No, you are not required to lose a bet to donate.

• How cool were those men’s semifinals on Friday at the French Open? That’s not a rhetorical question; I’m really asking because we didn’t get to see it out here live in California. When I turned on NBC early Friday morning, I didn’t see tennis; I saw the Backstreet Boys performing on “Today.”

I’m not sure if it was solely NBC’s decision, but for some reason, Murray vs. Nadal and Federer vs. Djokovic were shown on tape delay in the Pacific and Mountain time zones. By the time the Federer/Djokovic match “started,” it was already in the fourth set. After two weeks of DirecTV’s splendid French Open coverage, which showed all matches live, even those beginning at about 2 a.m. out here, what a lovely time to put the French Open on the back burner.

If it was NBC’s decision to delay the telecast, I would love to hear the logic behind that one. How any network could decide against showing perhaps the greatest quartet of male tennis players to ever play in a semifinal round of any slam in favor of Hoda and Kathie Lee’s latest round of alcoholic gossip babble is beyond me.

Albert Pujols Seems Just Fine, Thanks

Up to his old tricks

Remember a time not too long ago when everyone was asking the same question in baseball: “What is wrong with Albert Pujols?”

Never mind that Hanley Ramirez, another elite player and among the very best offensive forces in this game over the past few years, is hitting more than 100 points below his carer batting average and about 240 points below his career OPS — he doesn’t have a possible $300 million coming his way this winter. He hasn’t carved out a career path that could end with him among the five best hitters in the history of baseball.

Is it an injury, his age of 31, a pressing desire to not flop before appearing on the open market as the most valued free agent since Alex Rodriguez in 200o? Could it be something else because, I mean, it has to be something, right?

On May 23, Pujols ended a streak of 120 plate appearances without a home run. But it was only his eighth of the season! He’s still not right!

He looks good now.

Since May 30, Pujols is 12-for-27 with two doubles, five home runs and nine RBIs in just six games. That’s way too many numbers for one sentence.

The emphasis for Pujols’ current little hot streak began Saturday.

And then continued today.

Jim Schwartz Forces The Issue On Nicknaming His Defensive Line

Here's a great and proper nickname for the Detroit Lions' 2011 defensive line: The Detroit Lions' 2011 Defensive Line. It works on so many levels

***If you want to read much of what you’re about to read here as well as a very elegant and heartfelt dissenting opinion — and believe me when I say that you do — then follow the link, friends.***

There are some iconic nicknames for NFL defenses.

The Monsters of the Midway dominated in the 1940s and ’80s.

The Steel Curtain helped Pittsburgh win four Super Bowls in the ’70s.

The Purple People Eaters made it to four Super Bowls during the ’60s and ’70s and won the 1970 NFL Championship.

Silver Crush hasn’t played a down together.

But at least it’s got that nickname in place.

That’s all thanks to Detroit Lions head coach Jim Schwartz, who took to Twitter this past week to ask fans what should be the nickname of his defensive line. “Silver Crush” was your winner, America. The name is an homage to Lions defensive lines from the 1970s, which was labeled by an assistant coach as Silver Rush. That’s swell for Detroit; too bad everyone else’s first instinct will be to wonder why the Lions are trying to copycat the Denver Broncos.

The Tampa Bay Rays Do Grunge All Wrong

If Cobain ever liked baseball, he would be rolling over in his grave

I like to think that I have an eclectic taste in music. Outside of country and some jazz, I think I can talk tunes with any group of people. But 1990s grunge is my musical sweet spot.

As I’ve mentioned here before, my favorite band is Nirvana. I really enjoy Soundgarden and Alice in Chains. Silverchair, pre-1999, was pretty grungy and pretty good. Hole had some good stuff, although I hate to admit that. Pearl Jam’s “Ten” is just an amazing album.

Anyway, I like grunge music.

I never did like grunge clothing. Of course, it may have not been my choice, I don’t remember. I was about 7 years old when grunge was in its heyday, and I don’t think my parents preferred me going to my second-grade class in long-sleeved flannel shirts, tattered jeans, leggings and Chucks. They just threw some cute school-boy clothes on me. Stupid establishment. I looked like a suburban sellout. Whatever, nevermind.

But that was the fashion. It’s not whatever the Tampa Bay Rays consider to be “grunge.”