Home > Uncategorized > Which No-Chance Team Has the Best Chance of Winning Super Bowl XLV?

Which No-Chance Team Has the Best Chance of Winning Super Bowl XLV?

You could do worse than putting few bucks on the Browns to lift this thing in 2011. Like putting it on the Bills

I guess there are two broad schools of sports thought on this day after the Super Bowl. You can either be ready to get away from football or miss it so much that thoughts of the long seven months between now and the 2010 season haunt your dreams.

If you’re like me, you’re prepared carry on without football. I’ll long for it again in August, but I want to concentrate on the games at hand. I am salivating over the upcoming week of college basketball games and we are just four weeks away from the conference championships. Pitchers and catchers are about a week away from reporting to spring training, with plenty of intrigue surrounding many teams and plenty of usable players still available. To help bridge that gap between football and baseball season, we have the Winter Olympics this year.

And yeah, I guess we have the NBA to watch as well. I guess. I’ll be more interested once the two-month playoffs come along.

But if you can’t let go of the NFL, there is always next year. And there are already odds on which teams we will be talking about at this time, 2011.

All of the usual names have the best odds. The Colts are favored. The Chargers are second, which basically just means that they are slated to be a disappointment yet again. The Saints and Patriots are at 10/1 and the Steelers have 11/1 odds.

But who cares about betting on the Colts? Way to go out on a limb there, rebel.

I’m interested in those teams at the bottom of the barrel. The Bills, Browns, Buccaneers, Chiefs, Lions, Raiders and Rams are up on the board with 100/1 odds. So which of these teams has the best chance to win next year’s Super Bowl, even if that chance is somewhere between impossible and ridiculous.

Of all those teams, the first that I can eliminate is actually the Bills. That might surprise some, but of those seven teams, I see the dimmest reason to be positive about the Bills. They don’t have a quarterback. Both starting receivers are unrestricted free agents, and Terrell Owens certainly wont be back. They don’t have a productive tight end or an offensive line. I could say some positive things about their defense, but it’s hard to do so when those players keep getting hurt. It doesn’t help that they are in the tough AFC East. The only bright spot about that team is undrafted, third-year player from Coe College, running back Fred Jackson.

Next off the list is Tampa Bay. Josh Freeman may never be an NFL star, but if you watched the Bucs this year, he certainly has the tools to be an NFL starter. The offense definitely needs help on the line and at least one more receiver. But the big problem for the Pewter Pirates is defense. It’s simply deplorable. And most of those players are under contract through next season! Oy vey.

If only the Lions had just 21 other players as good as Calvin Johnson. That would be a halfway-decent squad

I give credit to Greg White for the official name change, but Tampa Bay has absolutely nothing in the front seven. Ronde Barber is the only good player … and that was about five years ago! No matter how many points the offense produces, that defense will find a way to allow 7-10 more. Eric Berry will be just the start of a long re-building process for this once-respected aspect of the Bucs.

The next two teams, the Rams and the Lions, have a couple things in common: One, they will continue to be horrible next season. But two, they each have a reason why you should watch them. The Rams don’t have much on either side of the ball, but they still have Steven Jackson. Even if the Rams are 1-and-400 or even if his spine looks like an open-road race course, you will still see him absolutely punishing defenders. The likely addition of Ndamukong Suh — and maybe Michael Vick — gives Ram fans a little more reason to be upbeat while their team is getting beat up.

With the Lions, it’s simple: Stafford to Calvin. Both were brought down by injuries last season, but if they stay healthy, that’s going to be a tremendous duo. The Lions currently don’t have a running game or a defense — outside of safety Louis Delmas. But at least the Lions give us an explanation for why Manny Ramirez didn’t do squat on the Dodgers last season.

There is always Stafford to Calvin.

I like what the Raiders have to offer — a shutdown cornerback, more than one useful running back, some quality, young receivers and a couple of bright spots at linebacker in Kirk Morrison and Thomas Howard.

The problem with the Raiders is not the names on the back of the jersey. It’s the name on the front. IT’S THE RAIDERS! They always find a way to screw things up! Obviously, the Raiders need a quarterback and an offensive lineman like Peyton Manning needs an endorsement. But with the brains of a moth, I’m sure the Raiders will end up wasting their No. 8 overall pick on something flashy, like Dez Bryant, at a position they don’t need to address.

The best of the worst comes down to the Browns and the Chiefs. Cleveland ended its season on a four-game winning streak and they finally have somebody smart (Mike Holmgren) making the decisions. There are reasons to be optimistic (Jerome Harrison, Josh Cribbs, most of the offensive line), but it still boils down to the greatest road block to NFL success: not having a capable quarterback. Maybe the Browns will pick/trade up for Sam Bradford or Jimmy Clausen. Holmgren is already hinting that the team’s quarterback of the future isn’t on the current roster. I’m pretty sure all of America came to that conclusion a few months ago.

The 2010 Chiefs won't exactly recall the memories of Hank Stram's teams. But the franchise is "matriculating" in the right direction

So that just leaves the Kansas City Chiefs.

The Chiefs have the most talent among the 100/1 dogs. Tyson Jackson and Glenn Dorsey obviously have potential. They just seem out of place in a 3-4 scheme. The secondary runs in quicksand, but maybe new defensive coordinator Romeo Crennel can fix that. He may not be a good head coach, but we know he’s had success running a defense. Speaking of a good coordinator being poor head coach — hey, it’s Charlie Weis! The last time those two were coordinators on a team, it ended up pretty well.

Weis and head coach Todd Haley will run an offense with one above-average receiver (Dwayne Bowe) and a decent complement (Chris Chambers). The offensive line needs help so that Matt Cassel isn’t decapitated, but Cassel is one of the better QBs among these bottom-feeders. Plus, he can always just give the ball to Jamaal Charles. He is a true game-breaker.

Congrats, Chiefs! Have a blast finishing at 7-9 in the AFC West next season and therefore surpassing your fan base’s already lowered expectations!!

I think the most interesting part of these 2011 odds is this: Two teams that faced each other in the Super Bowl just seven years ago are unquestionably two of the worst — and maybe THE two worst — teams in the NFL.

  1. February 20, 2010 at 5:10 am

    Informative post.
    I am going to bookmark this one.

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