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Michael Jordan Was Not A Good Romance Writer In High School

A rose by any other name -- not quite

This story is about a week old, but I didn’t get wind of it until yesterday.

A love letter that Michael Jordan wrote while in high school went viral last week. It was sold for more than $5,000 at auction in December 2004, but only now are we really finding out about it.

I’m sure it’s embarrassing for both parties involved to have a 30-year-old note made up of private thoughts thrown to the public and sold to the highest bidder.

I’m sure it’s a little more embarrassing for the woman involved to read again because it just reminds her of the vast riches she missed out on. However, he just would have cheated on her anyway.

But it’s not the most poetic thing ever.

Michael Jordan

My Dearest Laquette

How are you and your family doing, fine I hope. I am in my Adv. Chemistry class writing you a letter, so that tell you how much I care for you. I decide to write you because I felt that I made you look pretty rotten after the last night. I want to tell you that I am sorry, and hope that you except my apologie. I know that you feelings was hurt whenever I loss my necklace or had it stolen. 

I was really happy when you gave me my honest earn money that I won off the bet. I want to thank you for letting me hold your annual. I show it to everyone at school. Everyone think you are a very pretty young lady and I had to agree because it is very true. Please don’t let this go to your head. (smile) I sorry to say that I can’t go to the game on my birthday because my father is taking the whole basketball team out to eat on my birthday. Please don’t be mad because I am trying get down there a week from Feb. 14. If I do get the chance to come please have some activity for us to do together. 

I want you to know that my feeling for you has not change yet. ← (joke) I am finally getting use to going with a girl much smaller than I. I hope you my hint. Well I have spent my time very wisely by write to you. I hope you write back soon. Well I must go, the period is almost over. See you next time around, which I hope comes soon. 

With my Best Love 

Michael J. Jordan

The first thing that stands out when you click that link above the transcription is Jordan’s handwriting. That is some elegant-looking penmanship right there, folks. Graceful perhaps.

But the same can’t be said for Jordan’s spelling and sentence structure. You would think a kid in an advanced chemistry class would at least have decent grasp on simple English, but I counted at least 15 errors dealing with spelling, missing words and subject-verb agreement in this 300-word piece of affection. I didn’t even worry about punctuation and capitalization. That would be overkill.

OK, I’ll give His Airness the benefit of the doubt. Back in the early ’80s, you didn’t have tools such as electronic spell check available when writing letters. And considering he did this during the middle of class, Jordan was probably in a rush. Although, again, there’s nothing rushed about that beautiful cursive.

A few other things that jump out in the letter:

Did he really start out the letter by misspelling the subject’s first name?

“I was really happy when you gave me my honest earn money that I won off the bet.” Ah, yes. The genesis!

“Everyone think you are a very pretty young lady and I had to agree because it is very true.” Oh, my stars! (Swoon)

“If I do get the chance to come please have some activity for us to do together.” Considering we are talking about a young Michael Jordan, I’m pretty sure he would only accept (not except!) three activities: basketball, cards or sex.

Well this post is almost over. Well I must now go. Well I write soon. I know this best thing you have read <—(joke)

With my Best Love

Brian M. Murphy

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